Updated: Jan 9
The worst thing about procrastination is that it feels as if your book is never ending. Because it’s not - you’re not writing it. The guilt of not writing makes you constantly think, remorsefully, about your book and bad feelings always tend to do this - put you under an excruciating pressure for a long, long time, so that when you’ve had enough (procrastinating) you come out mentally unstable and psychotic. And, on top of that, it’s your fault. No one else’s. So, at some point, when you're fed up, you decide to embrace the fear of sitting in front of that blank page (or the written ones that you think are gibberish) and type (or read), instead of passively watching how your last nerves are slowly (but surely) succumbing to masochistic madness.
That’s what I did today - I read the last written chapter of my book, so that at the latest next week I can start writing again. Because I made a deal (she actually made me a favor) with a fellow writer (who’s finished her book!): she would tell me everyday when she writes (her second book!) and what her wordcount is. I am supposed to follow her example. Call it a writer’s despair if you must but I hope it works. It's like college all over again, as she said: work together but on individual projects.
Thoughts on chapter 14? (my fingers itch and my brain screams) BADLY needs editing - some things in it don’t match with others in chapter one. But hey, that’s editing and that’s what writers do AFTER the draft is finished.